There’s a guy called Shaun that works at my old company Chunk. I whipped him at Street Fighter IV last night, and that warrants a post of its own.
Because Shaun, you see, is a cyborg…
When it comes to Shaun, whether it’s DDR or Call of Duty 4, you will not find a better gamer this side of autism.
The whole truth, though, is that he only got a hold of the game last night, so the whipping doesn’t count. I reckon it’ll start counting in a week or two, after his siliconChip/organicBrain-hybrid device downloads environmental data related to SFIV project phase 1.0.
And then it’ll be game on. He’ll be the man(machine) to beat, no these primitive humans that I’ve been brawling with so far. And when I win – and I will win – I will claim the victory in the name of life, in the name of living matter, in the name of fields of green grass, in the name of the insect, the whale, in the name of the fucking common cold. In the name of all things that are being, not simply doing.
We created you, Shaun. But I will destroy you.
At Street Fighter IV.
Fuck’s sake.
I’ve got split loyalties here.
shaun hates games, ask him and he’ll tell you. he’s only good at sonic 1.
it’s worth noting that his blog is: http://blog.shauncampbell.co.uk/
That DDR thing looks absolute pish.
aye now try that with yer feet son
Did you build him while you were going through that robots phase?
Jesus , i’v never seen anything like that before! He’s really good with his fingers.
Looks fake.
…and gay.
I’ve seen the puggies at Millport, and I have no doubt in your credentials Limmy. But my money is on the ‘Shaun Two Towsand’. It’s just not an even match – mere flesh and bone against a cybernetic organism bred purely for gaming.
Shaun – I’m heading round your place to watch. This is gonna be better than Rocky 2!
What’s he doing there? Hitting the arrow keys to match the ones on screen?
that is just sheer madness
Wow
Look at ma face, look intae ma eyes! dae yae think this shaun guy gets the burds ah get? naw! he could put those lightnin fast fingers to proper use, but dis he? ah dunno dis he..?
Brian
“This is gonna be better than Rocky 2!”
Aye, Rocky III!
I’d hit out with some Rocky III patter, but I’ve already done that today over here on a similar SFIV matter:
http://www.connellandflorence.com/robert/?p=12#comments
“aye now try that with yer feet son”
I’m taking that as a direct challenge.
I used to like limmy before he posted this, though
You have no feelings of “like”, robot, you know only how to win. And when you don’t, I want Brian to be there to video the wisps of black smoke that will emanate from your ears.
Borg- he will either adapt or assimilate you Limmy. Competition is always good though.
In fairness to Limmy, he whipped me so bad when I first got the game that I had to go for two shits in the space of 15 minutes in my new bathroom suite (Zeus, hear my roar) just to decontaminate the sheer volume of fail that resided in my soul.
But then I studied. And noted. And became a warrior.
When Wilde and Shakespeare have been put to bed and I finish shooting this baws student picture I’m doing, I will renew my Live account.
There will be blood.
I bet that since this cyborg has no sense of compassion, he’ll be shite at Left 4 Dead since he won’t know the true value of a teammate. But saying that he’ll probably be a robotic killing machine that has no use of teammates and kills them in the saferoom “to put them out of their misery”.
And how, exactly, does anyone ever discover that they’re that good on a dancing game when they don’t even play it properly?
Conclusion of this report: ANDROID STATUS CONFIRMED.
GTF I always forget something.
A’d like to see him fairly startle a witch before me. Then he cin be called the best.
Calling all nerds !
Fuck it I now need to get myself StreetFigher IV.
Erin
March 4th, 2009 at 5:16 pm
Jesus , i’v never seen anything like that before! He’s really good with his fingers.
There’s just too many double entendres in that comment!
The Dude
“In fairness to Limmy, he whipped me so bad…”
Hold on, what d’you mean by “in fairness to Limmy”? You make it sound like there’s a long list of people saying I’m shite at SFIV, which there isn’t.
I win conclusively and comprehensively and I do it all the fucking time, I don’t need your fairness.
Fuck this av got tae get that game – there’s a 30 quid game voucher burnin a hole in ma pocket! Tomorrow begins the dawn of a new era…
Aye, but this Shaun fella is gonna leave you with a stingy ring.
In my opinion.
That guy is like grease lightning
So what’s going to happen? Can we organise “Fight Night: Human V Humanoid I” and broadcast it live? Maybe PPV?
If you get beat you could train Shaun for his next fight like Apollo training Rocky – crop-tops, head bands, the lot.
BTW – Shaun’s equally good at the real DDR. I don’t think that proves he’s humanoid one way or another but he could probably do that fancy rope footwork Rocky does.
Ah pumped ye 3-0 three days in a row!
Or have I been playing the fake twitter Limmy?
nae cunt play fitbaw on the auld xbox? …back of the ole onion sack. and i exclusivly mean fifa 09
I also concur with Jay.
Oh ffs! That guy is mental.
New headset tonight? I fucking think so.
get oot, get a burd, and stop pullin the heid aff it….dancin wi his fingers….wtf????
impressive..
but does his bionic brain comprehend………..’love’?
Pumped man, just got a 4-2 whomping aff the chief, well played mate. Electricity doesnae quite beat tiger fireball hings just yet, maybe wan day.
His burd must be one contented lassie.
Shaun Campbell! I went to school with you. Fuck a duck, the world just keeps getting smaller.
martinMMC – who called it dancing? are you typing in an accent to impress limmy? i doubt he gives a fuck.
Erin
‘Jesus , i’v never seen anything like that before! He’s really good with his fingers.’
Some funny shit.
Limmy I reckon Shaun is going to give you a right pumping.
Gez, haha, actually the world IS getting smaller – I’m crushing it!
aaron – mate, it’s called dancing cos it’s Dance Dance Revolution
haha fiona..
I know, aaron, godsake you cunt!
Just watched a documentary about the greatest donkey kong player ever last night, which led me to this site. Mental:-
http://www.twingalaxies.com
While surfing around this site I found this:-
http://www.twingalaxies.com/index.aspx?c=27&id=1696
Whom from Limmydom will step up?
Oh and check this fucking place out…..Xanadu:-
http://www.funspotnh.com/mws-genlinfo.htm
Gerry, pal, it’s not. It’s called Stepmania. Just fucking google it.
I was the greatest Donkey Kong player (in Saltcoats).
Whoa, calm the beans captain, okay so it’s called Stepmania. Martin clearly seen the DDR Mania title and got it confused just like I did. What’s the big deal? Also, weren’t the “you’re just trying to impress/suck up to Limmy” accusations supposed to stop?
Mone tae grips mate, stop looking for a fight just for the sake of it. Take that shite to Street Fighter.
xxx
Maybe all the lassies should get together and knit or something while all this boy gaming chat is going on.