I got delayed at work and only had time to call at a Tesco Express for the wife’s valentine gift. Unfortunately all the flowers had gone and the best I could manage was an “I’m your tweetheart”, Tweety Pie balloon(partially deflated) and a red fluffy cushion. Needless to say I had to get ma own tea! I am at this moment eating the Tesco chocolates, strewn on the floor in the aftermath of the Tweetie Pie debacle. Never mind, it’ll soon be mother’s day and an early morning trip to the petrol station forn flowers.
a only came online to play poker but ma table was populated by a leopard of wanks so a sacked it and logged oan tae this. happy commercialised bawbag day x
Limmy, I think your RSS feed is broken; I haven’t been notified of an update since Christmas and now I see all these posts here about Beadle and Rambo and other important developments. If you could fix it then that would be smashing because I’m not checking back speculatively every five minutes or even every five days for updates because that’s for fucking losers. Cheers!
Here, i honestly thought it was the guy who was meant to reach round and make her vomit. Wolfbag Etiquette kinna thing.
Ye learn something every day.
I heard that the practice originated in the 18th century or something – and i’m no jokin here – where the bored aristocracy used to ‘romance’ a goose or a big swan right up the rangers-end and jam its heid in a drawer at the vinegar bit.
“I heard that the practice originated in the 18th century or something – and i’m no jokin here – where the bored aristocracy used to ‘romance’ a goose or a big swan right up the rangers-end and jam its heid in a drawer at the vinegar bit. ”
That why the queen protects all the swans? So by law from years gone by when romance was in the air.
After munching a full box of love hearts fae the cash and carry, i have came up with the following.
“Heavy breevers”
“I spy on u”
“Descanted”
“Twister me”
“Flip me rip me”
“Tag team me”
“Varta my farta”
“Break me in”
“break me out
“My douche your touche”
“Rohypnol doll?”
“Gag bitch”
“R U Legal?”
“Dont press charges”
“I can still smell u”
“Soz for hitting”
“Im barren, lets fuk”
“My womb is a tomb”
“Batter my cunt in”
“Daddy?”
“Shhh dont wake up”
“Courts cant stop me”
“We die togther”
Im spitting these oot like a mp40.
More on request.
Apr 19.9%
Your home may be at risk if you do not laugh at my jokes.
why does one of the hearts say “just say no” ? they slipping in a Grange Hill type anti drugs campaign or sumthin?
Happy Valentines Limmy. See you on the Sunday Xx
Och, Valentine’s Day’s a load ae pish.
Haud on, one of those Love Hearts has “Just Say No” on it. They put moralising messages on these things now?
“Please Stop Me”
“Yes Dear”
That’s a cracking chat-up line isn’t it. What’s next, “I suppose so” and “No thanks darling”.
“Give Me Crabs”
“Email Me” – a sign of the times.
“email me” is the one that makes me sick. That’s right, sick to my core.
Check out Charlie Brooker’s Valentine’s Day Message:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2008/feb/11/charliebrooker.relationships
“DIE SOON”
“you’d get it’
“Fuck meâ€
they just want love too..
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/magazine/7239464.stm
bbc’s on yer bandwagon.
So thats what ‘E’s look like now… I’ve been told they are as cheap as sweeties these days…
Given the love theme what about the diseases of Venus, “THRUSH” for example…
or just plain “VD”, no?
“Baptise Me”
THEY FOUND A CURE FOR MAD COW DISEASE!
A dozen roses and a box of Chocolates
(sickipedia)
Ideas for slogan’s on lovehearts ?
I’m off the blob now.
my S.T.D has gone.
come back, baby adopted.
“SHIT ON ME”
“Hand job”?
“Feed Me Eggs”
“Sook Bum”
“boak”
“sharia law”
“spunk bucket”
“jizz monster”
“buckled arse”
“some ride”
“fanny magnet”
“pure cow”
First aff.
Why does everycunt have to be romantic on the 14th of feb.
Plenty of other days in the year.
Nothing but commercialised pish.
Love hearts
“diabetes kills”
“Mooth or fud”
“Suck on this”
“Toss my salad”
“Rape me”
“Pubes inside”
“Insert in vagina”
“Insert in bumhole”
“Poor credit ccj’s?”
Limmy I think that as posters to this blog we have been a wee bit good to you. Check out this cunt and how the 1st day of his blog went, the comments are fuckin magic.
http://blogs.guardian.co.uk/travelog/2008/02/skins_blog.html
“piss in my face”
“Fud me stupid”
Blue eyes? A little racist, isn’t it?
I got delayed at work and only had time to call at a Tesco Express for the wife’s valentine gift. Unfortunately all the flowers had gone and the best I could manage was an “I’m your tweetheart”, Tweety Pie balloon(partially deflated) and a red fluffy cushion. Needless to say I had to get ma own tea! I am at this moment eating the Tesco chocolates, strewn on the floor in the aftermath of the Tweetie Pie debacle. Never mind, it’ll soon be mother’s day and an early morning trip to the petrol station forn flowers.
DUFFTOWN JIM Says:
February 14th, 2008 at 2:11 pm |
Ideas for slogan’s on lovehearts ?
camo tee with a green heart and dark green print;
hasta la victoria siempre
then on the back:
Keep fighting until victory
***
Ideas to symbols or other things may be found here: (Might be a fist in the air with those written words) or ….
More ideas are here:
http://imdb.com/keyword/che-guevara/ ( films)
Or biography:
http://everything2.com/index.pl?node=Che%20Guevara
***********
or this one in a heart:
Save electricity
Make love!
on the back in a shining light bulb:
-Tonight ?
“sook ma baws”
a only came online to play poker but ma table was populated by a leopard of wanks so a sacked it and logged oan tae this. happy commercialised bawbag day x
“it’s rag week”
‘Wolfbag me’
Fuck sake, what’s going on?
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=wolfbag
Is there an opposite of Valentines day?
I liked the “DIE SOON” and “MOOTH OR FUD”, didn’t go down too well with the girlfriend though.
Neither did:
“PRO-ABORTION”
Limmy, I think your RSS feed is broken; I haven’t been notified of an update since Christmas and now I see all these posts here about Beadle and Rambo and other important developments. If you could fix it then that would be smashing because I’m not checking back speculatively every five minutes or even every five days for updates because that’s for fucking losers. Cheers!
happy valentines day from the Krankies
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=iShb6NBtCI4
Here, i honestly thought it was the guy who was meant to reach round and make her vomit. Wolfbag Etiquette kinna thing.
Ye learn something every day.
I heard that the practice originated in the 18th century or something – and i’m no jokin here – where the bored aristocracy used to ‘romance’ a goose or a big swan right up the rangers-end and jam its heid in a drawer at the vinegar bit.
Anyway,
‘Teabag Me’
Hawl! Limmy!!! I spotted you in Partick yesterday evening. walked right past me, unless you have a double?
barney. Says: “to ‘romance’ a goose or a big swan right up the rangers-end and jam its heid in a drawer at the vinegar bit.”
I tried that once, but the goose ended up jamming MA heid in the drawer when it started getting the jester’s shoes.
“I heard that the practice originated in the 18th century or something – and i’m no jokin here – where the bored aristocracy used to ‘romance’ a goose or a big swan right up the rangers-end and jam its heid in a drawer at the vinegar bit. ”
That why the queen protects all the swans? So by law from years gone by when romance was in the air.
# stevo Says:
February 15th, 2008 at 1:34 pm |
happy valentines day from the Krankies
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=iShb6NBtCI4
Man, that is so wrong.
Its disturbing but i can’t look away
I feel unclean now
“cheesey bunnet”
“scutter”
“miles oot”
Be
My
Blumpkin
RapeMeat
“cock it or walk it”
“smell yer maw”
“clown’s pocket”
“I’m Circumsized”
I for one am getting fed up having to deal with your pish
I had a couple of loveheart Mark McGhees last night and they were braw.
Shame Mark Ronson and in particular the crowd were fucking shite though.
After munching a full box of love hearts fae the cash and carry, i have came up with the following.
“Heavy breevers”
“I spy on u”
“Descanted”
“Twister me”
“Flip me rip me”
“Tag team me”
“Varta my farta”
“Break me in”
“break me out
“My douche your touche”
“Rohypnol doll?”
“Gag bitch”
“R U Legal?”
“Dont press charges”
“I can still smell u”
“Soz for hitting”
“Im barren, lets fuk”
“My womb is a tomb”
“Batter my cunt in”
“Daddy?”
“Shhh dont wake up”
“Courts cant stop me”
“We die togther”
Im spitting these oot like a mp40.
More on request.
Apr 19.9%
Your home may be at risk if you do not laugh at my jokes.
‘spit roast’
‘get yer rat oot’
‘doon the clinic’
‘have my retarded baby’
‘cleveland steamer’
‘is that an adams apple?’